Squidward And Sandy's Secret Date
by 11comics
Summary: Possibly very first Squidward/Sandy fic. Anyway, Self descriptive name there. Don't like, don't review.


Squidward fastened the band on his red tie. He headed out to the garage to get his new car. The reason why it was "new" because Spongebob took Squidward's old car for a "practice drive". Squidward's garage door had three padlocks.

Squidward undid the padlocks and drove his car onto the driveway, then got out and redid the locks back onto the door, just in case.

Squidward had nothing to worry about, since Spongebob and Patrick are at they're jellyfishing convention.

Squidward drove out of the driveway and onto the road. Because he had plans.

He had a date.

Squidward parked in front of Sandy's house/tree/dome. he walked up to the door and reached his suction-cupped fist to the door.

He knocked a pounding three times.

He waited for what seemed like eternity. Then he heard Sandy entering the air filled part of the door and closing it shut. Then he heard a small alarm as water filled the entrance.

Then the door creaked and open up to reveal Sandy. She was dressed in a purple dress with no straps. She was also wearing a miniaturized version of her air helmet.

"Hello, Squidward!" Sandy said with a smile. Squidward was just staring at her beauty then snapped back in reality.

"Uh- h- hi Sandy.." he said. "You ready?" he asked.

"Yep." she replied. Squidward escorted her to the car. He sat in drivers seat and she sat in the front seat. Squidward revved the engine and they drove away.

They reached the parking lot of _The Ship In A Bottle _fancy restaurant. Once they got out of the car, they headed toward the entrance.

"Hello, welcome to _The Ship In A Bottle. _How many are we serving tonight?" asked the waiter at the door, "just two" said Squidward. "Very Well" said the waiter. he didn't seem to mind that a squid was taking a squirrel out on a date, just as long as he get his paycheck.

The waiter lead them to the they're table and went to get them they're menus.

it was quiet now at the table. Then Sandy spoke up, "so, what do you do for a living, Squidward?". After about two seconds squidward replied "i uh, well like to play the clarinet, but mostly i like to make art. You know, sculptures, paintings… One time a made a perfect replica of yours truly, i left the room and took a bath, and came back to see _Spongebob _and_ Patrick _ ruining my sculpture."

Sandy nodded "That sort of happened to me. You see, i am a scientist and once built an amazing rocket. I was going to blast of to the moon to collect samples there but Spongebob came over and kept saying this jibber-jabber about aliens. He said he HAD to come and i said it was sort of ok. He blasted off without me, of course. So, i strapped on my jet pack and headed towards the moon but then i found out that they didn't land on the moon at all, so i came back and found Spongebob and Patrick dress up as astronauts. I told them that they shouldn't steal my property but they just _shot me. _with a net gun of course. and yeah, so they blasted off and crashed my rocket into the moon. But i don't want to talk about Spongebob or Patrick tonight." Squidward nodded, he knew that story TOO well. He once heard a rumor where Sbongebob and Patrick ripped all of Sandy's fur off, but it must have been just that, a rumor…

The waiter came back with they're menus, and handed them to them. "Ahem. May i suggest the roast beef, sir." the waiter suggested.

"No thanks," said Squidward, "i'll just have the clam chowder please." The waiter nodded. "Now what do you want, ma'am?" He asked Sandy. "Um, do you have acorns here?" the waiter nodded. "Okay then, i'll have acorns with a side of mint, steamed, please." Sandy said. "Very well then" said the waiter, then took they're menus and walked away.

Squidward and Sandy just sat there awkwardly. They have been planning this date for months, and, well, they just don't know what to do now. How they planned this was that they would go to Bargin' Mart and plotted there. because of course they couldn't send mail or E-mails because Spongebob and Patrick would just look at they're mail. Actually, Squidward should report them to the police for doing that.

The waiter came back and said "Oh i have forgotten, what sort of drinks would you like to have?" He asked.

Sandy was the one to reply first, "I would like a small glass of peanut juice, please." Squidward said his order about two seconds after Sandy, "i would just like a glass of water please…Oh, and with a lemon twist". The waiter scribbled that down on his notebook, "very well.." he said after about five seconds.

As soon as the waiter left, Sandy whispered to Squidward, "what makes you think he took so long?". Squidward replied in the same whisper, "maybe he was having trouble spelling 'peanut'".

Sandy scoffed, "huh, well duh. That idiot probably never even heard of peanuts." Sandy said as if she was talking about the whether. Squidward stared at her for saying an insult behind the waiter's back, and he thought it was _niiiiice…_

"Hey, miss sassy lips" Squidward said. Sandy turned her head towards his direction, "Where'd that come from? You just called that guy an idiot for having trouble spelling." Sandy was quiet for three seconds. "Yeah, so?" she said. Squidward answered in a low tone "I _like that."_ Sandy smiled, "well, thank you, _mister Squidward"_ She giggled those last two words.

The 'idiot' came back with they're food and drinks. Then placed they're meals on the table. He left with a quick bow and walked away.

When he was out of sight, both Squidward and Sandy said in unison, "Idiot." Then looked at each other and laughed.

The meal was rather fine, Squidwards chowder was ok, but it was Sandy's meal that got his nose to do a back flip. As it turns out, Steamed Acorns were an excellent choice. It smelled just like peanut butter, and it was all soft and chewy on the inside. Soon, Squidward had lost his appetite over the wonderful smell.

"Say, uh…" Squidward started to ask, "Could i, uh, try some of that please?" The question was about as awkward as asking some strangers permission if he could strip right in front of him.

Sandy slightly blushed, "I guess so," she said. She sliced a piece off her acorn and picked it up with her fork. She held it out in front of squidward's face, and beckoned for him to take a bite.

Squidward was burning of embarrassment, he slllloooooowwwwwly opened his mouth, then he slllllloooo0ooooowwwllllY took a bite.

He chewed, and his face brightened quickly, his eyebrows shot up, his mouth curved into a smile, and his eyes lit up. "This is amazing!" he said. Sandy giggled and got another piece and they practically did the same thing before but Squidward ate it more faster.

Squidward pulled out his checkbook and scribbled down the numbers, and left it on the table.

"Ready to go?" Squidward asked Sandy. She replied to a high pitched, bad imitation of Spongebob "I'm Ready! I'm Ready!" They both laughed and left the restaurant.

They talked very little on the way back to Sandy's house. Then, Sandy spoke up, "so, when can we do this again?"

Squidward replied "Gee, i dunno. I was mainly focusing on planning this date. I never really thought we could have a second one" he said this while stopping at a red light.

When the light turned green, Squidward revved and drove onto the Seaway. "Well, maybe we could have a picnic at the park tomorrow" Sandy said as Squidward drove into Sandy's neighborhood. Squidward pondered this, "Hey, maybe we could! We could buy food for it and get a basket and everything!" he said enthusiastically. Sandy smiled and nodded, They would go tomorrow.

Funny, this is. How they planned this date for months and then they plan another one in just a few minutes in the car.

When they reached Sandy's driveway, they both got out of the car and they headed towards Sandy's door.

"Hey, um, its been fun. I had a great time" Squidward said, "Me too." Sandy said. Squidward turned and headed towards his car. He reached the car handle with his tentacle when Sandy said this:

"Squidward, come here please"

Squidward turned, slightly puzzled. He was scared for a moment that he messed up the date, but no, Sandy was wore a devilish smile.

Squidward sllllooooooooooooooo000oowwwwly walked to Sandy.

"Y-yes?" he asked, with his face just a foot away from Sandy's face. Sandy Took a huge gasp of air from her helmet, then, while holding her breath, took her helmet off. Squidward panicked but then Sandy _kissed him on the check._

Squidward just stood there flabbergasted as Sandy quickly put her helmet back on and let her breath out.

"G'night!" sandy said, she opened up her door and walked in.

Squidward stood stunned for another minute and shook his head. He couldn't believe what just happened. _Sandy just kissed me!_

Squidward drove back home deep in thought, he still felt the spot where she kissed him, it felt sort of like a sun burn. And it still felt that way when he drove into the driveway and when he went to bed.

**Well, i hoped you guys liked it. Please no flames. like a said: don't like, don't read.**

**-Eleven comics.**


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